Halloween Dating

Dating Advice

This dating article, Halloween Dating was written as a sponsored post but unfortunate circumstances came along and it is no longer a sponsored post. However, I enjoyed writing it so I decided to share it anyway. Hope you have fun reading it.

halloween dating

 

Halloween Dating

I used to love Halloween when I was younger (and it is still my favourite ‘holiday’). It’s my birthday so I always had parties with everyone in fancy dress, or as I got older we would put costumes on to go out. I’ve met a few people I’ve dated when on a Halloween night out, and I’ve also arranged a few first dates for the same night.

If it’s a holiday you like, I think Halloween is a great night for first date because it gives you a pretty good insight into the person. What they dress up as, if they are willing to dress up, how they react to your costume (not to mention to other people’s). If you love Halloween it can give you a good idea what they think of it.

There are a few things to take into consideration when you’re planning a Halloween date. If you want to eat many of the nicer places won’t appreciate your costume, so you may end up eating somewhere you wouldn’t normally consider for a first date. Also, many bars will be busy, this can impact things if you want to have deep and meaningful conversations all night. However, if you just want a fun night with some light “getting to know you” conversation, dancing, and lots of fun it’s a great night.

Your costume has to be chosen with care, you want to enter into the spirit, while trying to be original, and not causing offence. If you don’t want to end up looking bad:

  • Don’t glorify violence against women
  • No problematic historical figures
  • Cultures are not costumes
    • No blackface, brownface, yellowface
    • No religious garb (hijabs, bindis, etc)
    • No native headdresses
    • No gypsy related outfits
  • Gender identity is NOT a costume
  • Sexual identity is NOT a costume

You might think you’re being clever or funny but you’re not. Also, a really bad idea are costumes that resemble outfits worn by problematic groups (KKK, facists, etc). For example, if I turned up and my date was dressed as Hitler I would definitely have an issue with it, and the date would not be going any further. Another good one to avoid is anything where your face is coated with grease-paint. This is just personal preference but there is nothing worse than going in to kiss someone only to end up with a mouthful of face paint…it really does not taste good. However, you can now get the body paints that dry when applied, so they don’t smudge off when you’re kissing…these can also be great fun if you want to pick a costume that requires full body paint (think alien characters from Star Trek) because it doesn’t rub off on your clothes.

If things go well and you decide you want to take your date home, you can keep the Halloween dating spirit going with nightcap cocktails with a spooky theme. Maybe you decorated for the holiday before going out. And for a truly silly sexy twist on the holiday glow in the dark condoms, dildos, and body paint can be a lovely way to add some extra entertainment to the fun.

 

For more of my dating thoughts, click here.

Morning Wood

Erotic Flash Fiction

I don’t know about you but I love the feeling of waking up to find his Morning Wood pressing against me, even if it’s just a one night stand with someone I met through a site like http://meetandfucksite.com/free-fuck-buddy-sites I still love that feeling.

morning wood

Morning Wood

I wake slowly, the sun slanting through the gap in the curtain, falls on the book on the bedside table. I can feel the weight of your arm resting across my waist. Your body snuggled against me, is radiating heat, and I wiggle closer trying to absorb it.  As my butt presses against you I smile, I can feel your morning wood between us. I know you’re still asleep and for a minute I consider waking you in a very nice way but I don’t know you well enough to assume you’d approve, so I decide to let you sleep.

I drift back to sleep, and when I wake up again, I know instantly that you’re awake. You’re pressing against me, rocking your hips. I think about rolling over but part of me is curious. I want to see what you will do, so I continue feigning sleep. I mumble and shift, as if caught in a dream, and you let go of me, rolling onto your back. I hold myself still listening to you.

I can tell you’re trying to be quiet, to not wake me. I expected you to start sorting yourself out but I can feel both your arms, one down between us, and one coming over your head. I wonder if you’re trying to go back to sleep, and for a while I think you have. Then I hear you sigh, and you move the arm that was between us.

I can still feel your upper arm pressed against me, and as you start to stroke yourself it rubs against my back. It’s a slow gentle movement, and my skin breaks out in goosebumps of arousal, as if I felt a sudden breeze. I open my eyes slightly looking down my body, and realise I can see you perfectly in the mirror covering the wardrobe door. You’re still lying flat on your back, head tilted upwards, one arm thrown over your face, so your forearm is covering your eyes. Your cock is standing straight up from your body, with only a slight curve towards your stomach.

As your fist moves up and down the shaft, you pull your cock, tugging it away from your stomach. Your movements are much firmer than I would have been, they’re almost rough. I watch you, fascinated by the way you touch yourself.  I can feel myself getting turned on, my nipples peaking as my cunt throbs. I want to wriggle to touch myself but I don’t want you to stop what you’re doing. I hold myself still, trying to keep my breathing even, hoping you won’t realise I’ve woken up.

I feel like a voyeur, watching you when you’re unaware but I’m too drawn in by your morning wood to care.  There is something delightful about watching you like this, it’s a glimpse into something that I don’t get to see often. When I ask someone to wank for me there is a certain level of self-consciousness because they know I’m watching, while that doesn’t spoil the view it definitely doesn’t give me the same thrill that watching you now does.

As his hand tugs and strokes his cock I feel a wet heat in me. His movements are becoming more jerky and uneven. Up to now his only movement has been his hand but now he arches his back thrusting into his fist, and I bite back a moan not wanting to disturb the show, as I press my thighs together tightly. My eyes are now wide open watching him. I’m torn between not wanting to move, and wanting to turn over and join in. He whispers “fuck” pushing his hips towards his hand as his stroking gets faster.

I know he must be close to coming and listening to him is causing an answering throb in my cunt, I pressed my lips together so I won’t moan. His fist tightens around his cock, squeezing hard, as he thrusts. A thick ribbon of cum spills over his fist onto his stomach, as he gives a loud grunt, and I jump. His hand relaxes to his side, and before I can react, he moves his arm from over his face, meeting my eyes in the mirror. I freeze, knowing it is obvious I’ve been watching him.
He starts to grin, “Is it still a one night stand if we have sex in the morning as well?”
I smile, “Oh yes, yes it is.”

 

 

 

You can read more of my erotica here.

**Disclaimer – This article was sponsored by http://meetandfucksite.com/free-fuck-buddy-sites.

Sex with No Strings

Sponsored Post

Online dating started in the 90’s but in the last ten years it has blossomed with a variety of sites becoming available. I’ve tried it……on multiple occasions. Every so often I re-activate my accounts on dating sites, and see how things go. However, sometimes I’m just not looking for a relationship, sometimes I just really want sex, which is when a company like Sex With No Strings is invaluable.

sex with no strings

Sex with No Strings

More people are into casual dating these days than ever before; partially due to all the different dating sites we can choose from online. This culture of hooking up with partners for fun or even brief moments of companionship is now more prevalent and people are really liking the convenience of it all. You can just go online and message people for a good time; and as long as you’re using the right site there is no reason why you can’t be successful at it. The only important thing is to make sure you and your partner set some sort of rules to make sure everything goes smoothly.

Casual dating – how to set your rules

So why should you need to set rules? It feels like a straight forwards deal: you meet up, you have a drink or two and then if all goes well you take this party somewhere else… But the reality is that we all have different preferences, especially when it comes to sex. What one enjoys doing is another one’s pet peeve, so it is important that the two of you communicate with each other. This is the big word which is at the centre of all this article: communication. Because without the saying the most basic things first; a casual encounter can go from good to being an absolute disaster.

So when do you start talking about those ‘rules’? It seems a bit dry and functional to chat people up online, only to break the conversation and say: ‘’okay, I want this but I don’t want that…’’ You’ve barely met and you’re already ordering them around, telling them what to do. The best thing is probably just to start chatting first so you can discover each other a little better. Instead of making it sound like you’re establishing rules, you can start by talking about what you enjoy doing and what you don’t like to do in bed. Then you can ask that person what they think, what they like to do. Make it part of a natural conversation rather than just being bossy; it will encourage natural communication and the two of you will be better off for it.

Rules, plans, guidelines… all those things fall into the same category when meeting someone for casual sex. It’s basically that awkward conversation you need to have before you get started. So one of the main things about sex with no strings is that some people assume it’s going to be the case of meeting / having a drink / running to the next hotel room available. However you can’t take that for granted, especially if you’re new to the whole concept of sex dating. So you’re best off having a conversation about: ‘’Hypothetically if we take this further, how would we go about it?”. Leave no stones unturned, talk about the general aspects and the details. Start with ‘where’, go to ‘what’, then move on to ‘how’.

Where: where will you go if you’re going to have sex? A hotel room? Which hotel? How much can you both afford to spend in a hotel room? Are there other alternatives? The bottom line is that location cost money, but at the same time you want to be in a room where the two of you stand on equal grounds (i.e. not your house or their house).

What: what will you do in bed? Will you sit down, talk dirty and get each other excited? Will it be full sex or just playful touch? Will it be gentle or rough? What should be done and not be done? A lot of questions, but it is worth talking about so either of you doesn’t sign up without knowing what the encounter will actually entail.

How: Who pays for the hotel room. How do you transport yourself there, maybe a taxi? Who brings the condoms, what else do you need to bring to make the encounter more comfortable and more fun? How many gadgets, toys and lubricants of sorts should you bring? Should you establish some sort of safe word in case things get too rough for either one of you? What about discretion? Do you both want to keep your escapade(s) as a secret? If so how do you go about that? Basically, it’s all in the details…

So you get the idea, and there is no way a short article could cover all the details involved in the logistics of adult dating and hooking up. But the baseline principle of communication and setting rules shouldn’t be too difficult to get your head around. Sure you’ll be feeling a little (a lot) excited when you’re going through the process of meeting a potential naughty partner, but preparing as much of it as possible in advance will give you a chance to really make the most of that encounter. As they say: ‘failing to prepare is like preparing to fail’; and no one wants to fail at something that is fun and feels so good when it’s done right.

 

 

You can read about MY dating experiences here.

**Disclaimer – This article was written in conjunction with Sex With No Strings.

 

 

My Sex Hookups – Sponsored Guest Blog

Sponsored Post

Online dating started in the 90’s but in the last ten years it has blossomed with a variety of sites becoming available. I’ve tried it……on multiple occasions. Every so often I re-activate my accounts on dating sites, and see how things go. However, sometimes I’m just not looking for a relationship, sometimes I just really want sex, which is when a company like My Sex Hookups is invaluable.

my sex hookups

My Sex Hookups

My Sex Hookups are an online ‘dating’ company specialising in sex connections. Sex dating can really awaken your inner tiger and roll the years back. Sex dates force you out of your comfort zone and really tap into your inner animal. Thousands of years ago humans didn’t play the social dating games we play now? If there was mutual attraction, they simply had sex! Nowadays we insist on playing games and beating around the bush. Not at MySexHookups! Sex dates are fun because you know what you’re going to get at the end of it. There’s no confusion about why you are both there!

Your online dating profile, and why it should be your own

We all know Google can be our best friend, especially when it comes to finding things out. How to create a CV, how to write a covering letter… those are amongst the many things that we can look up when we don’t know what to write. It is great that we can get access to pre-made templates, letting us to fill the blanks, but that doesn’t always lead to creating something that is really personal. This is definitely the case with online dating profiles: sure you can pick up a template that everyone uses, but how exactly will this make you stand out of the crowd? Maybe it is time you do it all by yourself…

A profile is personal

The first thing, which might sound obvious, is that your dating profile should be about you, not someone else. It is not just the points that are being made but also how they are written. If you usually speak in a certain way, one can expect your writings to reflect you particular tone. So if you’re using something that someone else has written; it won’t sound like you no matter how you move the words around. Okay but a general profile means more mass appeal right? Well not exactly, those things don’t really work that way. Think about it, if everyone is writing the same thing, how to you get to distinguish between the different people. Surely not everyone is the same, and you actually want to find out who they really are. Also, a pre-made profile won’t really adapt to your needs; whether you are looking for a serious partner on Eharmony or you just want women seeking sex on My Sex Hookups or other adult dating sites.

Wrong expectations

Let’s say your language isn’t that good but your profile description is that of a scholar. People who read your profile will have certain expectations, only to be let down once they actually meet you. Consider it false advertising; it might not be intentional but people will feel like they’ve been deceived. This is not a good way to start a date; whether you’re looking for a relationship or even just a bit of adult fun. It’s not that you’re directly lying, but it can be interpreted that way. Using someone else’s pre-made template might not portray who you are and it could actually feel like you are trying to deceive people.

Templates are boring

If you’ve spent any time reading through people’s CV’s, you will appreciate that going through a whole bunch of similar sounding ones is just boring. Ultimately you’re more likely to pick up the one that stands out of the crowd. It is exactly the same thing with dating profiles. Sure the picture does play an important role in differentiating between people; but the description is ultimately the best indicator of potential compatibility. If people all sound the same, you’re only left with not much of a choice. If you want your profile to stand up, forget about how other people do it, just do it in your own way. Use your words, talk about what you think is relevant. If it really doesn’t work, you can always change and edit things until you get a good sense of what works for you.

The picture is important

As mentioned above, your profile picture will be your first distinctive feature. Of course you will want to use your best pic, but that is no good if that picture was taken ten years ago. The picture looks good okay, but your date will figure it out once they meet with you face-to-face. Your best bet if you can’t find a good recent picture of yourself is simply to get one done. Use your selfie camera, or better yet get a friend to take some pictures of you. Just dress how you usually dress, just make sure you’re happy with the photo. As long as it represents you well, then the only thing you can do is wait for people to get back to you if they find you attractive. Patience always works out in the end

 

 

You can read about my dating experiences here.

**Disclaimer – This article was written in conjunction with My Sex Hookups.

Online Dating

Personal Article

It’s been a while since I wrote this type of personal article. Online dating began in the 90’s, but it has blossomed in the last ten years with a variety of sites becoming available. I’ve tried it……on multiple occasions. Every so often I re-activate my accounts on dating sites, and see how things go. This has given me a store of tales in my library, so when I got chatting to Jay, who in 1999 founded SwingTowns, the Leading Open, Poly, Kink and Swingers Dating Social Network. I thought it was the perfect time to tell some of those stories I have been saving.

online dating

Online Dating

Usually when I chat to someone from a dating site I have to explain the whole non-monogamous, bisexual thing. It often surprises me how often people actually ask me what I mean. For me they are mainstream terms, and reasonably self-explanatory so it confuses me when people ask me to explain them. The conversation generally goes downhill from there. I used to have it on my profile but it caused more issues than it solved. It was much easier to chat to someone, and once I was comfortable enough to arrange a meet up mention it. The reactions vary quite a bit from the guys who immediately ask if that means we can have a threesome, the women who ask if I’m just experimenting with lesbian sex, and the horrifying ones who tell me I’m going to hell before they block me.

I have had a few good responses; one guy who was relieved because he was the same, and he was happy he didn’t have to explain it. We went out for a few months but we realised it wasn’t going to work out, despite some similarities we ultimately wanted different things, and the chemistry just wasn’t there in the bedroom. We lost touch after that. There was a girl who was happy for me to date men while seeing her but would rather I didn’t see any other women. That was okay with me too but she ended up not being able to deal with it in the end…which I totally get, non-monogamy isn’t for everyone. There was a stream of people I kind of felt were just dating me so they could tick me off some sort of bucket list, they were all an interesting experience.

I can’t remember at what point I got fed up of trying to explain it to people, and decided to just not mention it until I’d been on at least one date with someone. See if we clicked in person, and had chemistry before I told them. It’s funny how much it changed my online dating experience. I had a really great first date with a guy, we’d really clicked online and got on really well. He was older than me but only by five years, and he was just kind of adorable in the things he would say. I’d had a few bad experiences so I decided I wasn’t going to sleep with him on the first date. I was hoping if I took sex off the table things might go better.

We planned a fab day time date, something that appealed to the geek in both of us. We met at the cinema and went to see a new comic book film. We had really great chemistry, and when he took my hand in the cinema it felt totally natural. After the cinema, we headed off to a pub for a late lunch. Four hours later we were still chatting, laughing, and kissing in the hidden booth at the back of the pub. We ended up going to another couple of pubs, I’d switched to soda at some point because I didn’t want to get drunk. I was having too much fun. We’d been out all day together. It was about 9pm, we were walking between pubs, and he was talking about checking his train times so he could get home. I casually asked if his return ticket was open, when he said yes, I told him he could come home with me if he wanted. He actually stumbled as my words hit him. I have to admit that made me smile a lot.

We had one last drink, and then headed back to mine. My housemates were in the living room when we got in so I felt I had to do a quick intro before heading up to my room. I put on a film, and we snuggled up on my bed to watch it. We continued the touching, stroking and kissing that had been started in the pub but because we had privacy we were able to start taking off layers, and getting naked. Afterwards we cuddled up and he fell asleep stroking my hair. The next morning, we had some more fun together and then we got to chatting. As I talked about various things, little bits of doubt started creeping in. He was a monogamous guy, which is totally cool but seemed to think I would become monogamous when I met the right guy. There were a few other little things that gave me pause, and I ended up deciding not to see him again. He was a really nice guy; very sweet, caring, considerate, and the sex was really good. We just weren’t right for each other.

When you’re online dating it’s quite hard to be bisexual, non-monogamous and kinky using ‘regular’ (or vanilla) dating apps. Even more so when you houseshare, and feel awkward bringing people home on the first date. Which is why websites like SwingTowns are such a great idea, they take a lot of the worry out of online dating for people like me, people who society seems to consider the weird people of the dating world.

 

You can read more of my dating tales here.

 

 

**Disclaimer – This article was written in conjunction with SwingTowns, The Leading Open, Poly, Kink and Swingers Dating Social Network.