Third instalment of my Online Dating series, First Time Girl, where I talk about the first time I had sex with a girl. Online dating began in the 90’s but it has blossomed in the last ten years with a variety of sites becoming available. I’ve tried it……on multiple occasions. Every so often I re-activate my accounts on dating sites, and see how things go. This has given me a store of tales in my library, so when I got chatting to Jay, who in 1999 founded SwingTowns, the Leading Open, Poly, Kink and Swingers Dating Social Network. I thought it was the perfect time to tell some of those stories I have been saving.
It’s funny, it took someone else pointing it out for me to realise I was bisexual. It wasn’t that I didn’t know it was a thing but more that it was so far out of my range of experience the possibility never occurred to me. I knew I sometimes fancied women but I also knew I liked men, so I couldn’t be “gay”. So, when I was having a conversation with a friend, and she said “Honey, you’re bisexual.” It was a bit of a personal lightbulb moment. It just made sense to me.
For a long time, I didn’t really do anything about it, and then I met this cute girl at an event and some very PG making out happened. She asked me back to hers, and I’m embarrassed to say I panicked and declined. I didn’t know how to admit to her that I hadn’t had sex with another woman before, or even if I needed to. It was a bit of a defining moment for me, I didn’t want that to happen again.
I went online with a very specific dating plan. I needed to find a lovely lady who was willing to be partly teacher, and partly experiment. I had to word the ‘ad’ really carefully. I didn’t want a relationship I just wanted one night where I could explore this side of my personality, and take my bisexuality from a theoretical idea to a solid, yes this is me. I didn’t think it would be easy to find someone but it was actually much easier than I expected. I was very clear about what this arrangement was about, and I made sure to reinforce the idea of an easy out for either of us, as well as discussing taking it one step at a time.
We arranged to meet in a bar, to give us chance to get acquainted. We got on really well, conversation was flowing easily, and it felt comfortable. When she asked if I was ready to head out, I was happy to agree. I was fine until we got to her flat, at which point my nerves kicked in but she was totally on the ball, and in an effort to ease the pressure she asked if I fancied watching a film.
She put on The Avengers, and we sat down on the sofa together. She snuggled close and held my hand. Not long into the film, I realised she was stroking my leg. She was leaning against my shoulder, and it felt totally natural to turn my face to kiss her. We ignored the film as we made out, when she slipped her hands under my tee, I pulled it off, and she grinned as she reached around to unhook my bra. As she played with my breasts, I tugged at the hem of her shirt lifting it off. She wasn’t wearing a bra, and to me she had the most perfect small boobs. They fit perfectly in my hands, and it was easy to cover them while rubbing my thumb over her nipples.
We moved to the bedroom, and stood at opposite sides of the bed to take off the rest of our clothes. I tried not to stare while she was undressing but I wanted to look at her. I noticed the curve of her hips, the slight bump of her stomach, the lines of muscles in her legs, and when she turned I have to admit I grinned. I am a sucker for a good butt, and hers was lovely. Round and firm…and totally peachy. I did feel a bit pervy just standing there watching her, and remembered I needed to take off my own clothes. I slipped off my skirt and was about to take off my bandelettes (lacy stocking tops without stocking attached) when she spoke, “Can you leave those on?” She was sat in the bed watching me, and I smiled, pulling off my knickers and leaving the stocking tops on. I got into the bed, and she reached down, stroking them, “I love these.” She kissed me.
A few hours later, I propped myself up on one elbow watching her. Her eyes were closed and she was breathing raggedly. I bit my lip, as her breathing steadied and she opened her eyes to look at me. “How do you look so worried? That was great.” I reached out, stroking my finger in a line down her torso, and she pulled me down, hugging me before resting her head on my chest. “Everyone should have a pillow like this for the comedown.” I started giggling, and she bit my nipple making me wiggle. And then we started all over again.
The next morning, she made me coffee and toast, and we chatted about the night before. She was really lovely about it all, asking me if it was what I’d expected, and how I felt. It was funny, the more I tried to articulate my feelings the sillier it seemed that I had been so nervous about the whole thing to start with. When I left, she hugged me, and told me to keep in touch. We’ve met for drinks a few times but never had sex again. She’s kind of become one of my emotional sounding boards, especially with regards to sexual feelings. If I’m ever stuck in my head and being a bit silly, I know I can message her and she will talk me round.
I’m really glad I did it but I don’t think it will stop me being nervous in the future. I get nervous when I meet a new guy so stands to reason it would be the same with a new girl. So, if you’re looking for people to enjoy an experience like mine, I highly recommend SwingTowns.
You can read more of my dating tales here.